Love Him (or Her) Like a Dog.....

Not that I should be giving advice about marriage to ANYONE, but I have boiled the secret to a happy marriage down to one simple concept:

Don't get married unless you love that person like a dog.

A dog is never in a bad mood. You can leave him for hours and hours, and when you get home he is thrilled to see you again. He doesn't pout that you left him, he just wants to be scratched behind the ears and allowed to lick your hand.

You can go so far as to leave a dog at a kennel or a mother-in-law's house for as long as a week, and even though you might feel guilty while you're gone, he will not punish you with the silent treatment or beg for souvenirs when you get home. He will love you just as much as if you just returned from the grocery store.

A dog never rolls his eyes or makes faces behind your back. He might not get your jokes, but he does listen, and he never scoffs or insults you. He will fetch the ball just as many times as you will throw it, and if you hide it from him because you're tired, he will forgive you.

A dog will curl up beside you and doze happily, but he will also jump up and follow you to the bathroom or the kitchen or the basement or outside every single time, and he won't act all pissed off because you woke him up.

A dog doesn't mind if you gain a few pounds, and he won't notice if you lose a few. He loves you just the way you are. He appreciates your cooking no matter WHAT it is, and he will do a little dance for something special like a piece of cheese.

A dog wants nothing more than to hear your voice speaking in sweet tones.

Until a person can feel like a dog toward another human being, he or she shouldn't get married. Until you can be just as happy to see the other person at the end of a long day as you are after a long separation, don't even bother tying the knot.

I'm only sorry it took me so long (and so many tries) to find someone who still makes my tail wag even after 15 years.

And it isn't even our anniversary.