Monday, December 12, 2011

Dear Powers-that-Be.........

I'm tired of being cold.

It isn't even winter yet, and my classroom is FREEZING. Students come into my room from the hall, and almost to a person, they say, "Man, it's cold in here!" Or some similar rendition.

At which point I glare at them and offer up some similar (but much more professional) version of "No shit!"

I am an adult, I watch the weather forecast religiously every morning and every night, and I dress appropriately. When the weather person said this morning that our high temperature wouldn't get out of the 40's today (please stop hating me, all you people who live in much colder places -- this is GEORGIA we're talking about), I planned ahead. I ditched the outfit I had planned to wear today in favor of a much warmer one. I wore a cowl-neck sweater WITH a tank top underneath, black jeans (so what if it isn't Friday, they're probably going to fire me when I build a bonfire in the middle of my classroom anyway), socks and equestrian-looking boots. (Side note: I couldn't even WEAR those boots for the last two winters because my lower legs were too fat. Go me!) At the last minute I even threw on the crocheted scarf with the pockets on the ends that the Warrior Princess made for me a couple of years ago.

Thank you, Warrior Princess, you SAVED MY LIFE today.

I froze all day. I'm pretty sure the high temperature in my classroom was lower than the high temperature outside. Pretty sure.

There's this little box on the wall right above my desk with a sliding switch. It says "cooler" at the bottom and "warmer" at the top.

You aren't fooling me, Powers-that-Be. I know you just put a fake box on the wall because that freakin' thing DOES. NOT. WORK. I've got it all the way up to "warmer," and it just sits there and chuckles at me.

And while we're on the subject, you bunch of Communists, thanks for that new rule that prohibits teachers from having radios, microwaves, refrigerators, candles, and SPACE HEATERS in their rooms. I can understand the candles, since a veteran teacher almost burned down the newly built wing on one of the high schools, and I realize you are trying everything you can to cut costs, up to and including furloughing teachers for six days a year, but COME ON! I'm FREEZING here.

I'm pretty sure God did not put me in the South because he wanted me to freeze to death.

If you want me to retire early, just say so. You don't have to ice me.

Ice Queen aka Bragger

1 comment:

DJan said...

Now that's COLD for Georgia. And when it's cold down there in that part of the country, it's usually humid and feels even colder! If you do make a bonfire in the middle of your classroom, could you please take a picture? Thank you! :-)