Writing.....

So I've decided to write a book.

Actually I decided to write a book a long time ago. I've wanted to write a book since I was about 12 years old, but I've never really put my mind to it. One problem is that my best "writing" comes from the thoughts I have after I go to bed, before I doze off. It's not good for my sleep pattern to get up and put those thoughts down on paper (computer), so I just "write" from night to night, never getting the words down in any concrete form.

Yesterday at school, while the students were working and no one needed my immediate attention, I picked up a tablet and started writing by hand. I would scribble for a while, stop when a student needed my intervention or someone came in with a question, and then I went back to writing. In longhand.

I consider myself fairly technologically savvy. I may not always keep up with the latest in technology, but I know how to use what I have. And I consider it a personal challenge to figure things out, to do things with technology that I haven't done before.

So I am puzzled as to why writing in longhand comes easier than writing on the computer. Yesterday I jotted ideas down for a few pages (it was a small tablet), and then I typed them into Word. Not only did the writing come more naturally, but it was less of a disruption when someone interrupted me. On the computer I have a hard time getting my thoughts back together; with the pen I just picked it back up and continued where I left off.

I thought I was over my propensity for writing in longhand when I wrote my dissertation. There was too much writing to do in too short a period of time for me to write it out by hand, so I learned to compose on the computer. Blogging has also improved my ability to write using the computer. But for some reason when I write what I hope will become a novel (dare I hope for a best-seller and Oscar-winning movie? a girl can dream, can't she?), I do what I think is my best writing on paper. Real paper. With a pen. Black ink. How ordinary.

I'm also feeling a little conflicted about doing my writing at school. Is that being dishonest somehow? It's not like I'm shirking my job or anything. I never tell a student, "Hold on, I'm writing here!" It beats spending the quiet moments surfing the Internet, doesn't it? Doesn't it?

A huge hurdle I have to get over is my reluctance to share my writing with anyone. I have challenged the Warrior Princess to finish HER book. I suggested we read each other's writing and perhaps even have a writers' retreat somewhere. (Damn, damn, damn not getting to buy the house on the marsh. It would have been the PERFECT writing atmosphere.)

I even thought about posting chapters of my book here as I finish them, but are there copyright issues? Am I then self-publishing? Does that mean the book would never come out in real pages with a cover and my picture on the back and everything? Would someone find my book on the Internet and steal it, forcing me to hunt him or her down and commit a felony?

I'm pretty sure I have no idea what I'm doing.