Wednesday, August 17, 2011

How to Win Friends and Influence People......

We had a student return this year to interview for our program. She was at our school two years ago, but she dropped out. She has since had a little girl, and (she says) realized the importance of finishing her education. She only needs 9 credits to graduate, which she can easily do in the course of a year in our program. Or less. I had a pretty good relationship with her when she was at our school before, so I took her on as one of my advisees. (The devil you know...)

After telling the other teachers how badly she wanted to come back to school and how her little girl made her want to complete her education, yada yada yada yada, she didn't come to school the first day. Or the second day. Or the third. Finally I found her cell number and sent her a text message, basically asking, "What's up?"

She said she way on her way to school the first day when she got a call that her cousin had been in a really bad wreck with both her daughter and my student's daughter in the car and she had been "in and out of hospitals and dealing with lawyers." I sympathized and asked how her little girl was.

"She's bruised a little from her car seat but she will scream when she gets in a car seat now."

I said I hoped she got over the trauma and told her again I was looking forward to seeing her. She said (again) that she was soooooo ready to get back to school .

That was on Thursday, and I didn't hear any more from her. On Monday I texted her again, telling her they would start deleting no-shows and she would have to re-enroll if she doesn't show up. She said her little girl had her last appointment that day and she would be there the next morning. I told her what her schedule was, that I was her advisor, and she should report to me as soon as she got there.

You can probably see where this is going. She didn't show up yesterday EITHER. She texted me around 8:00 last night asking if she still had a seat, and I told her she hadn't been withdrawn YET. She assured me she would be there and her mom was bringing her. Then she texted me again immediately and asked what if she couldn't come today because she had child support court. I guess she suddenly remembered.

I told her it wouldn't make us kick her out, but every day she didn't come was just one less day she could use to make progress toward graduation. Then she wanted to know if she would be allowed to work threw [sic] lunch when she came. Dedicated, right? Wanting to forgo lunch to get her work done?

Her mom called today and talked to our secretary.

She made up the whole story. Her cousin was indeed in a car accident, but it had nothing to do with this girl. Or her baby. The mom is trying to get the girl to come to school.

Every time I think I've heard it all, someone surprises me again. I mean, using her BABY in a lie? And an elaborate one at that? Even after all these years, I still get fooled.

Sure, I'll help you get your diploma. But I'll never, ever believe another one of your stories. I don't care HOW convincing it is.

Little twit.

3 comments:

A said...

If she put as much energy into her studies as she did into her lie, she would be done with school by now!

Julie said...

Maybe it was a metaphor, the car accident was a recognition of her own life being "wrecked" by her own actions.

Anonymous said...

She would do well on a creative writing course!!