The T9 Demons......

Has anybody out there had any funny experiences with the T9 feature when texting on your cell phone?

First of all, let me just say right here that I have resisted the temptation to turn the word "text" into a verb. Text is a noun and should remain so. There should be no text, texted, is texting, has texted.

But I give. It's just too hard to keep saying "I sent him a text message." I find it disturbing that changes in our language occur because people consistently MISUSE it. That's what happened to the word "judgment," which should not have an "e" after the "g." But so many people couldn't learn that lesson that whoever makes these decisions threw up his hands (because I KNOW it was a man who gave in that easily) and said, "Whatever. Judgement, judgment. Who cares?" English teachers, that's who. Before long it will be perfectly acceptable to say, "I laid down to take a nap." Shudder. And "I know it was him, I seen him." Double, triple shudder.

But I digress.

I don't have the T9 issue because I have a Blackberry, with a full keyboard. Which necessitates spelling out the entire word, because as I have already established elsewhere in this blog, I don't do abbreviations. I think they are evil. Just like turning nouns into verbs. But whatever.

When I was at the SEC Gymnastics Championships, Hubby (whom I have just taught to send a text message by any means other than t y p i n g i n e v e r y s i n g l e c h a r a c t e r a n d p u t t i n g a s p a c e a f t e r e a c h o n e a n d n o s p a c e s b e t w e e n w o r d s) sent me a text message (see there? I can't do it consistently) that said, "Did we who?" He likes to pretend he doesn't care about the outcome of gymnastics meets, but he can't fool me.

I almost texted back, "No we didn't who, but we came in second." But I was afraid A) he wouldn't get it; and B) if he did, he would be offended that I was making fun of him. I didn't even point it out when he finally grasped the concept of texting in general and sent me a message from the golf course that said, "An getting to be a pro at this."

When he was at the casino in Mississippi, he texted me that things weren't going well. In the casino OR on the golf course. Being the considerate wife, I asked if he wanted me to transfer some money from OUR savings account into his checking account. Already calculating what I could buy for myself to compensate for his bad luck. Because that's how we women think, that's why.

His response?

"On."

Since it was only two letters, I assumed he didn't mean "yes." He said his phone couldn't spell OR play poker. At least he didn't lose his sense of humor.

My friend Wanda the Warrior Princess fell victim to the T9 demons herself. In her defense, she has only recently surrendered her Blackberry to her teenaged son and begun using what she refers to as a "Little Tikes" cell phone. So she has to readjust to the whole T9 thing.

The night I was at the "school bored" meeting, she sent me a text to tell our male co-worker that so-and-so "hit a home run to who the game." I couldn't resist. I texted back, "I love it when we who the game." To which she responded something that I vaguely remember as referring to my being a smart-ass.

My favorite one, though, was when she texted her son to ask if they had left yet for an away baseball game, because she was unsure of their departure time. She meant to ask if they were on the bus, but the T9 demon struck again.

The message her son got?

"Are y'all on the cup?"

I still laugh every time I picture her son getting that message. He texted back, "What?!!!!!!!" And he doesn't even believe in punctuation.