Dancing with the Stars Dilemma......

Because it's the end of the school year and the end of the online world semester and I'm tired and didn't want to go back to school after Spring Break and my brain is mush, I'm going to blog tonight about something I don't have to think very hard about. Unlike all my other postings, which are fraught with intelligence and angst and humor and meaningfulness.

Or not.

I am in a quandary about whom to pull for on Dancing with the Stars as the season winds down. There are only 6 stars left, and I like them ALL. I know someone will have to go tonight, though, and it makes my heart hurt.

But please don't tell me, because I won't know until tomorrow morning, when I watch the recording.

Unlike the NCAA Gymnastics Championships, whose outcome I already know, but I will STILL record it when it is televised on May 9th AND I will save it to watch over and over during the off-season. (Wonder if I would still do that if we hadn't won? Hmmmmm.......)

I felt really sorry for Lawrence Taylor when he was eliminated last week. But he was actually relieved, because it meant he wouldn't have to miss any more tee times. In our house we know just how important that is.

Here are the remaining stars and the order in which I think they will be eliminated.

Ty Murray has come a long way, and the dancing cowboy is just so cute. Plus he has that precious wife of his, Jewel, who got knocked out of the competition with an injury before the season even started. But I'm afraid his niceness won't keep him in the game, especially after Len told him last night that it's time for him to "hit the road," but I will HATE it when he has to leave. He's just had such an upbeat attitude about it the whole time, and he's funny to boot. No pun intended. No, really. I didn't mean to.

After Ty, I think Shawn Johnson will be the next to go. My heart doesn't want to say that, because she IS, after all, a gymnast. Her little girl charm is endearing, and I really LIKED all the back handsprings she did in her Lindy Hop. Or Jive, or whatever it was a few weeks ago. But in the end I don't think she'll be able to summon enough sultriness to hang with the likes of.....

Lil Kim. Not that I would necessarily call what she's got "sultriness," but she can move body parts that shouldn't look like they have hinges in them, but they do. I've tried not to like her, because after all she dedicated her whole experience to the girls she was in prison with, but she sure can dance. I think Derek Hough will keep her in the competition longer than anyone else would have been able to, but I don't think she'll make the top three. I could be wrong, however, between her and...


Chuck Wicks. I don't necessarily think he's that much better than the others, but he DOES after all date Julianne Hough in real life, and if necessary she'll keep him in that studio 24/7 until he gets the steps right. He's already come a long way, and he can swing those hips like Elvis. Okay maybe not, but he's still come a long way. I have no idea how he sings, but he's cute in satin. He was even cute in a one-armed leotard and tights last night, and that's saying something.

It really hurt Melissa Rycroft in the standings when she couldn't dance last night and had to be judged on her rehearsal performance, but I don't think it will be enough to eliminate her from the competition. I could be wrong; it's happened before. Once. A long, long time ago. Not only does she have the advantage of having been a Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader, she gets all the sympathy vote for having been dumped on national television by the Jerk. I mean the Bachelor. [I would like to offer full disclosure here and say I have never, ever watched The Bachelor, nor will I. At least not on purpose.] She entered the competition late, and she has been amazing from the beginning. She and Tony are an excellent match, and I just love her sunny personality, her wit, and her style. I don't care too much for the tattoo on her back that they paintakingly cover up every week [why not just give her a dress that covers it up? Now THERE's an idea], but I love her dancing. In the end, however, I think it will be....

Gilles Marini who takes it all. I have never seen the movie Sex and the City. Come to think of it, I haven't even seen a single episode of the series, and the entire set is sitting on my shelf. So I didn't know he was the naked neighbor and have never seen the shower scene. He's not really my type, so I doubt he'll make my teeth sweat like he apparently does for millions of other American women. And some in other countries, too. But he can dance, and he is paired with Cheryl Burke, who could make Orca look graceful.

So there you have it, my predictions, for what they're worth, and I'm sure that's not very much, especially to those of you who don't watch Dancing with the Stars. Or even abbreviate it DWTS. Or even know that's how OTHER people abbreviate it.

I promise that future posts will have more meaning, more gut-wrenching emotion, less fluff. I may post about the great shoe purge, where I will disclose which of my many pairs of shoes I will discard and which ones I will keep. And even the basis for my decision.

I may post about the myriad items in our basement and ask for your feedback as to why you think we are forced to walk around some of them. Honestly, I'd like to hear from someone much more intelligent than myself on some of these.

I may catch Gus on video when he tears across the yard in pursuit of a squirrel and then stops at the base of the tree and turns around as if to say, "Hey! Where'd he go?"

Those topics, however, all require that I get out of the recliner.