Monday, April 2, 2012

Dance Dawgs...Where the Hair is Part of the Choreography....

The UGA Dance Dawgs are young ladies, college students, who perform at home gymnastics meets and basketball games. (And I'm sure they perform at other events too, but those are the only ones I'm personally acquainted with.)

Snarky as this post may turn out to be, I have to admit that these girls can dance. And they have negative percent body fat, if that's possible. Katydid wants to know how their pants stay up, because they are well below their belly buttons. (Personally, I think their pants are painted on.)

I really, really wanted to be snarkier about these girls than I'm finding it possible to be. I looked up the requirements and found a document detailing the complex audition process. It also spelled out the commitment requirements, and I found myself thinking, "Holy cow!!!! How do they GET 12-16 girls who will agree to all that?"

They practice from 7:00-9:30 PM on Tuesdays and Thursdays. (Hello? That's past my bedtime.) They have conditioning from 6:00-8:00 AM, also on Tuesdays and Thursdays. (Hello? These are COLLEGE students. Be WHERE at WHAT TIME?) Oh, and they have additional practices as scheduled.

For this great honor, members are ELIGIBLE to receive a $300 stipend at the end of the academic year, provided they meet the minimum GPA requirement of 2.5. (Hello? When the hell am I supposed to STUDY if you've got me PRACTICING and CONDITIONING all the time?)

I looked everywhere for other requirements for being a Dance Dawg, because I'm pretty sure there's some discrimination going on. What do short-haired girls do if THEY want to be Dance Dawgs? Hmmmm? If they can't do the hair choreography, I'm guessing they aren't allowed.

In the words of Ron White: "That's profiling, and profiling is wrong."


The girl said...

I think I expected more....that was just plain awful, badly coreographed and the hair was a bit much, I thought they were better than that, reminds me of a bad high school dance team...I think I was a bit mean :( oh well c'├ęst la vie

Wiley said...

I am almost relived. I thought it was just the Aggie dance team that was terrible, but apparently being out of time with the other dancers is a requirement in college dance teams. Don't get me wrong, they all dance WAY better than I ever could, but I know my limits and, well, I'll leave it at that.